


Relative Earth

by Maplesyrup



Series: Heavenly Bodies 'Verse [2]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Aliens!, Belle is a space librarian, F/M, Heavenly Bodies Remix, Rumbelle - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-12
Updated: 2019-02-28
Packaged: 2019-10-27 03:42:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17759123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maplesyrup/pseuds/Maplesyrup
Summary: autumnstar prompted on tumblr: How about that Heavenly Bodies remix where Belle's the alien and she meets Mr. Gold?OHOHOHOHO SHALL WE NOW???!??!?! I THINK WE SHALL.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Heavenly Bodies](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9849791) by [Maplesyrup](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maplesyrup/pseuds/Maplesyrup). 



> This remix has its own name now! And character tags will be added as the folks appear.
> 
> (changed the rating to E for a hopeful future :P)

Earth was a curious little blue marble smack at nearly the front of a tidy cluster of planets orbiting the prettiest life-giving star Belle had ever researched. To see it up close and personal, from its very surface, was a dream come true, and the little librarian happily traipsed around the small town she’d found, flicking through her tablet and recording everything interesting she came across.

Which happened to be _absolutely_ everything.

She came across a building labeled “Storybrooke Library” and let out a little squeak of happiness, reaching for the door. Excitement bubbled through her veins but was dashed to a cold death as the door refused to budge. She frowned. Was the library closed? Why? Who would ever do such a thing?

She turned, scanning the area around her for some type of life form she could speak to. Her eyes lit upon what appeared to be a male being led down the road by a medium-sized quadruped with black and white spots, connected to the man by a leash. She held up her tablet and smiled as it brought back information.

_Canine - domesticated. Colloquially known as ‘Man’s Best Friend’. Gendered vernacular aside, a proven reliable companion, coming in many varieties, shapes, and sizes. Current breed: Dalmatian._

The Earthling with the canine seemed friendly enough but she scanned him just to be safe.

_Earthling - also domesticated. Male. Initial scans indicate relative harmlessness, however, proceed with caution. Common language - English. Current breed: American._

Flush with information, Belle walked over to the male and his canine, waving to get his attention in what she hoped was a friendly manner.

“Hello, Earthling American Male!”

The male stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes widening as she approached.

“Um… h-hello.”

“Oh, sorry, one moment.” Belle flicked through her tablet, nodding when she found what she needed. She stuck out her hand.

“I am pleased to make your acquaintance.”

The male slid his pale hand into hers and she pumped it once, smiling all the while.

“L-likewise, I’m sure.” He slid his hand away, his green eyes still large in his freckled face. How curious, were all Earthlings just one color? Did they have more variety? It was a pretty pale-peachy shade but she wondered what other shades Earthlings came in. She frowned. Silly thing, she was getting distracted from her real question!

“Can you tell me, Mr. Earthling, why your library is closed?” She sighed. “It’s such a sad thing to see!”

The Male looked over her shoulder and let out a huffed laugh.

“Y-you’ll have to speak with Mr. Gold about that, I’m afraid.”

“Oh,” Belle breathed. “Is that his color? He’s gold?”

“What? Oh, n-no, that’s just his name.” The Male scratched his head, and his canine whined by her feet, sniffing her shoes. She smiled down at him.

“If you want to talk to him, his shop is over there.” The Male pointed to a small building, the hanging sign out front reading _Mr. Gold’s Pawn Shop and Antiques_.

Belle gave a decisive nod.

“That I will! Thank you, Mr.-”

“A-Archie.” The Male interrupted, blushing. “You can just call me Archie.”

Belle smiled, pleased.

“Archie it is then. You may call me Belle.” She studied his face for a moment, then nodded again.

“I like the pink with the pale peach. It’s lovely. You should show your colors more often!”

With that, she turned, marching towards the little shop, determined to find this Mr. Gold Earthling and see what could be done about getting that library opened.

* * *

 

That damned bell was going to drive him out of his mind one of these days. And whoever was standing under it, ringing it continually to get his attention was going to die a slow and painful death.

Gold snatched up his cane, taking a deep breath to quell the murderous urge before pushing through the curtain that separated his workshop from the retail space.

“You’re going to wear the thing out, dearie--”

He stopped at the sight that met him.

A petite brunette stood under the bell, one arm reaching upwards as she stood on her tiptoes. A ridiculous position as she was already in needle-thin heels that looked ready to snap even under her seemingly slight weight.

It wasn’t the position that made him freeze, however. No. It was the strange, pearlescent blue sheen to that arm he saw stretched to the bell above.

He shook his head, gathering his wits and rolling his eyes at himself. Likely some oddity in human form who liked to paint herself. Perhaps it was a new fashion being sported among the younger of the town's denizens.

Idiot youths, the lot of them.

He cleared his throat rather forcefully, thumping his cane harder than necessary as he drew closer to her.

The woman whipped around, arresting his steps for the second time, but for an altogether different reason.

Her joyous smile beamed out at him, making him feel like a creature too long denied the sun. The pale pink of her lips went wonderfully with the glacier blue of her eyes and the paler silvery-blue of her painted skin.

Every smooth bite of an insult fled in the face of that radiance and he stood there, stupid as a mule, as she practically bounced towards him, even the little clip of her heels against the floor a cheerful sound. She was the bell above his door made real. He mentally shook himself against the wistful thought.

“Hello, Mr. Gold Earthling!”

A sensual, throaty voice shouldn’t come out of something that small and adorable. He nearly smiled at her but coughed, forcing a scowl to his face and running his eyes over her in an attempt at disinterest.

His brain caught up and registered what she had said and he scoffed. Leave it to his luck to get the nutters in. At least he still had the head of the hospital on speed dial from his long-ago injury.

“Storybrooke Asylum is that way, dearie,” he said, pointing with one finger of the hand wrapped around his cane handle. “You’ll show yourself out, I trust.”

He moved his cane, preparing to make his way back to the antique watch waiting to be fixed but that sweet voice stopped him.

“Oh, no, my apologies, Mr. Gold Earthling. I was told you’re the male to query as to the status of the Storybrooke Library. It’s closed, you see, and I find myself rather curious to know whyever it should be so?”

He regarded her over his shoulder and saw her lift a small rectangle of clear glass right about at his eye level. She tapped at the screen a few times, a little frown crossing her brow and it was so charming and sweet that he turned fully back to her without his conscious knowledge.

“It says here that you are from a place called Scotland and that while heavily accented, you _do_ speak English.” She looked up at him over the glass. “Have I gotten the syntax incorrect? It seemed to be fine when I spoke with Archie but perhaps I missed something.”

She tapped the glass once more, making a few noises of frustration and he stepped forward, a hand outstretched.

“No, no. I speak English, dearie.” Dangerous game, this was. He really should call the hospital and get her sorted quickly. However pretty and distracting she may be, she was definitely not all-together and could be a danger to herself or him. Best to remain calm and head for the phone as soon as it was safe to do so.

“Why don’t you, ah, wait right here? I just need to make a quick phone call to an associate and then we can…proceed.” He moved to her, reaching for the glass in her hands, his tone pitched low and, he hoped, soothing.

“Just let me have the glass, alright?”

She gave him an odd look.

“Well, alright, but you might not be able to read what it says.” She shrugged, handing it over. “Here you go.”

He took it with a nod of thanks, relieved to have the ersatz weapon away from her. He glanced at it, a shock going through him as he registered his own face, near a series of slashes and squiggles that looked to be an odd cross between Cyrillic, Greek, and Arabic.

“What the hell-”

The glass was plucked from his hands, and her gentle tsk met his ears.

“I told you, Mr. Gold Earthling. I speak your language but I have a feeling you’ve never heard of mine.”

She giggled and his head snapped up to her. He took a step backward, fumbling to keep his balance. She reached out, catching him with startlingly quick reflexes and a strong grip, keeping him upright.

“Oh! Hey! Hey there, are you alright?” Concern furrowed her brow and she bit her lip. “Let’s get you sat down, you poor thing.”

His vision swam and he blinked, trying to clear his eyes and head. She pushed him down into a soft chair, his mind dimly wondering where she hand conjured it from. He took a deep breath, willing the discombobulation to fade, and glanced around.

The familiar sight of his shop was gone. In its place was an oddly soothing beige room that smelled faintly of those new-age herbal antiseptics the environmentalists were always on about. The chair he was in was quite comfortable but regardless, his insides seized with panic and he shot out of the chair, his cane nearly buckling under the force of his thrown weight.

“W-where the hell am I?” His eyes darted around, his senses seizing upon the sharp, painful looking objects that lined the walls and the odd, levitating white gurney in the center of the room.

“What the fuck is this place?”

He stumbled, his cane slipping on the smooth floor, and he went crashing to the ground. A feminine gasp met his ears and strong hands were suddenly cradling him, wrapping him in a warm, soothingly-scented embrace. Like roses, only different. Sweeter, deeper, and a bit darker than the normal scent of a rose.

“Hush, now.” She rocked him a bit back and forth and he felt foolish for the pleasure it brought him. He wasn’t a bloody infant.

“You’re on my ship and you’re going to be fine,” she lifted a hand to smooth over his hair, “you had a shock and you’ll come back to yourself soon enough. Just stay still for a moment. I won’t hurt you.”

He nearly scoffed at that. This tiny thing? Harm him? Lame though he was, he still had several stone and inches on her. Hurt indeed. Foolish woman.

...Was she a woman? She’d said ship, and he was fairly certain they weren’t on a boat. If it wasn’t a boat then-

_No._

No, it wasn’t possible.

Alright, it was possible, but highly, _highly_ improbable.

She was not an alien. He was not being cradled in a bespoke suit on the floor of a spaceship _by an_ _alien_.

He must have made some noise of disbelief as she started shushing him again, humming some odd tune that immediately made his brain turn to mush and had him wondering what all his fuss was about, anyway?

Maybe he could just stay like this forever. In the arms of a pretty, silvery-blue alien woman who smelled very nice and had such a soothing voice. It was like being a child held in safe, loving arms. He smiled stupidly, nuzzling against her breast.

Yes, he’d just stay right here. Forever.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gold wakes up in a strange place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoops, my hand slipped and I wrote another chapter, guess I'll just keep going then.
> 
> Thank you, autumnstar, for always saving me from myself :P :D <3

Belle gently rocked the Earth male to and fro, humming and hoping it would settle his fretting.

Were all Earth creatures the same?

She frowned to herself. Well, no, of course they weren’t. _Don’t be assumptive._

Archie had been a delight and his canine companion was adorably curious. Mr. Earthling Gold was likely more susceptible than most to shock and his life was likely a regular pattern of occurrences that precluded things out of the ordinary. He may not have the synaptic structure available to handle large, brief shocks.

Poor sweetheart.

She managed to get him to her quarters fairly easily, despite his sleeping weight, though she was breathing a bit heavy by the time she deposited him on her bed and tucked him in.

Smoothing the covers over his chest, she gazed down at him. The silver in his hair was quite pretty, mixed among the brown strands, and she wondered why his biology didn’t spread that lovely silver across the rest of his skin. It would likely be so nice, just a gentle moonlight shimmer. Perhaps mixed with a smattering of bronze here and there to mimic his hair.

She sighed, pulling back and admonishing herself for her rudeness.

All creatures were born as they were meant to be, regardless of planet of origin. His species was much more subtle in their coloring and that was lovely and perfectly fine. She mustn't apply home-knowledge to non-home species.

She plucked a book from the shelf closest to her bed, settling into the armchair and opening to the first page, trying to focus on the information in front of her but her attention kept straying to the Earthling in her bed.

She hoped he wasn’t scared when he woke up.

* * *

Gold swam up from the depths of a rather pleasant, yet odd, dream, his consciousness surfacing slowly.

What a bizarre idea his mind cooked up while sleeping. Alien women and otherworldly lullabies. He really needed to start taking an actual lunch break instead of working doggedly through it without eating. There was really no need, he was merely stubborn and old habits were hard to break. He took a deep breath, stretching in the soft silk sheets that surrounded him—

_Wait._

His eyes cracked open. A small, silvery-blue hued brunette sat near him in a deep blue armchair that dwarfed her, clad in a pretty blue dress with a book in her hands. She slowly turned a page, her face placid as she hummed a gentle melody while she read.

So. Not a dream then.

She looked up, catching his stare and he was treated to another one of those dazzling smiles.

“Hello,” she said, her voice low and pitched soothingly, “how was your rest?”

He frowned, pushing himself up from the luxurious bedding and glancing around the room as the sleep fog cleared. The space was feminine but tasteful, in blues and creams. Antique-looking furniture dotted the space and the bed was a high four-poster with cream-fringed blue curtains adorning the side.

So much damned _blue_ everywhere. It was like being inside an alien robin’s egg.

“Whose…whose room is this?” His voice was rough from sleep. How the hell long had he been out?

“Mine. I couldn’t very well let you sleep on the medical bay floor, could I?”

Her smile quickly changed to a frown.

“Would you have been more comfortable there? My research shows that Earthlings are similar in form to my own species, so I assumed you’d prefer a bed.” She pressed a hand to her chest, her face the picture of remorse. “My apologies if I was mistaken.”

He shook his head, bemused.

“N-no. No, it’s fine. I, ah, I prefer beds.” He glanced down at himself, seeing a pair of royal blue pajamas where his suit should be. An embarrassed flush crept up his cheeks. Had she undressed him? Seen him _naked?_ Who knew what manner of things she might have done to him while he was asleep?

He queried his body, feeling nothing out of the ordinary but…she was an alien. A sudden concern filled him that, in a quest for knowledge, she may have taken certain liberties while he’d been sleeping.

“Your suit is clean and pressed and don’t worry, I didn’t undress you.” Another sweet smile. “I have a portable, well, wardrobe I believe you would call it? Anyway, it did the job for me. Are you hungry?”

He shook his head again, somewhat mollified, but still.

“Did you do… _things_ to me while I was asleep?”

His cheeks flamed hotter as he asked. Her brow furrowed for a moment before understanding dawned and her eyes went wide.

“Oh! Oh, _no_ , that is _entirely_ against all rules of ethics and besides, it would have been _very_ rude, indeed!”

He stared, her impassioned explanation making him feel silly, and a bit small. He tugged the covers around himself in a makeshift barrier against her unrelenting cheerfulness and dropped his head on a yawn.

“You look like a youngling in its nest,” he could hear the smile in her voice, “it’s very sweet.”

He grunted in acknowledgment that she had spoken, finding a sudden, strong desire to get off the bloody ship and back to his own home. He pushed the covers away and slid out of the bed, looking around for his cane.

“Mr. Gold Earthling, you should rest more. You had quite the shock. You need time to process.”

She stood, reaching out to him but he brushed her off, limping over to where his suit hung from a knob on a tall chest of drawers.  

“T-thank you for your hospitality, Miss—”

“Belle. My name is Belle.”

 _Of course._ “I really need to be going, Miss Belle. My son is due from school,” he checked his watch, the thing miraculously remaining despite the rest of his clothing having been removed, “in a half-hour and I need to be home for him.”

He began jerking the suit pieces down from their hanger.

“If you could be so good as to give me my cane, it would be greatly appreciated—”

He turned, waving a hand in an impatient request for his cane, but her expression stopped him. Her huge blue eyes began to water, easily discernible even from his distance, and she looked panicked.

“Shit,” she whispered, the first non-eloquent thing he’d heard her say. “I-I didn’t know. I didn’t _think_.” She darted to one end of the room, producing his cane, and pressed it into his hands.

“I’ll get you home right away. I am so, _so_ sorry. _Please_ don’t tell.”

He frowned, confused at the way she was able to switch between emotions so fast, but waved a hand.

“It’s fine, dearie. No harm done.”

She bit her lip, looking unconvinced, but nodded.

“I-I’ll leave you to dress. Just press the inset panel on the door when you’re done and it will open to let you out. Then I’ll take you home immediately, I _promise_.”

She slipped out, leaving him alone in the pretty blue room. His mind spun for a moment before clicking back into sanity and he changed as fast as he was able.

 _Bae_. Focus on getting back to Bae. Son first, strange alien woman later. Hopefully she would just drop him off and he could get back to his nice, normal day. He’d have to finish some work at home but it was no matter. Bailey was old enough to entertain himself for a bit after dinner. There was certainly to be homework and likely plenty of drawing to keep him occupied.

A smile rose unbidden to his face as he imagined for a moment Bailey’s reaction to Belle. He’d be so curious, pestering her with questions that would certainly make her dash out of their house, tearing at her hair—

He mentally slapped himself. What the hell was wrong with him? Bring a foreign species into his home? Around his _child?_ He must have lost what little sense he’d been given to consider something like that. She could be dangerous. What if she _ate_ children?

He paused, scoffing at himself.

She likely didn’t eat children. Not if her reaction to him having a child was any indication. Still, he shouldn’t trust her.

He hurriedly finished dressing, fixing the buttons of his waistcoat and tugging his jacket into place before opening the door as she had instructed.

True to her word, she was there in the hallway. Patiently waiting, by all appearances, though her back was to the room.

He cleared his throat, aware of an odd, nagging sense of guilt that he couldn’t place.

“I’m ready to leave.”

She turned, a little smile on her face, the apples of her pale cheeks plumping as her lips curved upward—

He blinked once and then again to make sure he wasn’t seeing things. When the visage before him didn’t change, he managed to stammer out a question.

“W-what happened to your skin?”

She touched her face, her brow furrowing lightly before it was chased away by a little grin.

“Oh! You mean my cloaking! Do you like it?”

He shook his head.

“I—I don’t—”  

She waved a hand, cutting him off. “It seemed best to try to blend in. It was silly of me not to realize it ahead of time but I was so excited about being here that I completely forgot.” Her smile dimmed as he gaped at her like a slack-jawed moron.

“Or…i-is it wrong? Did I get the algorithm wrong? Is there something there that shouldn’t be?” She plastered her hands to her face, feeling around, pinching here and there. “Math has never been a strong point of mine. I was always much better at gardening and art and history. It took me four tries before the first cloaking device I ever had worked properly. I think I’m—”

His hand shot out without his permission, grasping her gently by the elbow until she lowered her hands from her face.

“N-no,” he said, his voice a quiet rasp. “No, there’s nothing wrong. It was—a surprise, that’s all. You’re lovely.”

Another adorable smile slowly curved her lips. “Really?”

He blinked, his brain crashing back down to Earth, bringing his common sense with it. He jerked his hand back, his arm swinging awkwardly by his side for a moment.

“No, I-I meant—you—did fine. It’s fine. You look…fine,” he finished lamely, his cheeks burning.

She huffed a little laugh through her nose.

“Well, thank you. Promise to tell me if I grow something that shouldn’t be there?”

He nodded, mumbling and darting his eyes away to land on anything but the very pretty, far too cheerful, uncomfortably earnest little alien standing in front of him in those ridiculous heels of hers.

“Well!” She chirped. “Let’s go get your boy, shall we?”

**Author's Note:**

> Just a fun little remix of HB that's not heavily planned or anything like that. Just a thing for me to play with when I'm stuck on other stuff. I hope you all enjoy it!


End file.
